Keeping Your Children Out of Your Divorce Conflict

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During and after a divorce, it is absolutely crucial that both parents continue to be involved in a child’s upbringing.

Hence,  a majority of child custody orders made by the Family Justice Courts are joint custody orders so that both parents continue to make important decisions for the child jointly.

Here are some things that parents can do to reduce conflict and to prevent the child from being harmed by the divorce:

  • Stop blaming each other for the divorce.
  • Keep your children out of your disputes.  Being caught in the middle between both parents the child love can be extremely traumatic for the children.
  • Control your emotions.
  • Avoid name calling and blame.
  • Do not resort to physical violence.
  • Talk to your children and make them understand that the divorce is not about them.  Tell them that both daddy and mommy still love them.
  • Have a Parenting Plan in which both parents continue to play an active role in the children’s upbringing.

Always remind yourself of the following:

  • My child has only one childhood, and that childhood should not have bad memories of daddy and mommy fighting.
  • My child has no control over this divorce, but is greatly affected by it.
  • Any conflict between us will adversely affect my child.
  • My child should have a close relationship with both parents.
  • My child loves both parents, and I should not make my child choose.

You and your spouse can and should resolve your children issues amicably.  In 2017, 93 percent of divorce cases with children issues were settled amicably during mediation at the Family Justice Courts.  Hence, there is already a recognition among couples going for divorce that children issues should be settled peacefully.



At PKWA Law, our team of Family Lawyers are consistently named as leading Singapore family lawyers by respected independent legal publications such as Asian Legal Business, Singapore Business Review, Global Law Experts and Doyle’s Guide to Singapore Family Lawyers. 

Our team of family lawyers are accredited Mediators and Collaborative Family Practitioners with the Singapore Mediation Centre.

Contact us at tel 6854-5336 for a free first consultation. 



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